There is not much that can be done to stop the passing of time. Though we may try to ignore it, the inevitability of aging eventually catches up with us.
For example, when looking at your phone pictures from last year, or when lathering your skin with anti-aging cream, or when suddenly meeting your unrecognizable childhood friend in a supermarket, or when scrolling for your birthdate in a drop-down menu.
These humorous yet poignant reminders help us keep track of our ever-changing lives and the fleeting nature of time.
Bored Panda recently published a list of 50 Moments That Made People Realize They’re No Longer Young and we’ve picked what we think are the top 15 and have added a bunch ourselves.
1. You get alcohol at a restaurant or liquor store and the person serving you never thinks twice about carding you anymore (But you ALWAYS got carded, even well into your mid-30s).
2. (True story) I was dating a girl who was about 15 years younger than me and played some music from the late ’90s to which she replied, “So you like the golden oldies.” I tried, to no avail, to convince her the “golden oldies” were songs from the 50s and 60s. And then it hit me. Maybe I’m old.
Piggby-backing off that, I was browsing through Rolling Stone Magazine recently and realized I wasn’t familiar with any of the Billboard 1 artists on the current singles list. It made me think about how 90s music is like 60s music to teens and 20-somethings these days.
3. OK, I knew what the sweary abbreviations like “SOB” and “WTF” meant but had to access the Urban Dictionary when 20-somethings used newer ones on social media like “FYFI,” “FTFW”, “JFGI” and “ASAFP.”
BTW (By the way) you can find those answers here.
4. When I discovered my sciatic nerve. OH SH*T… So, you randomly bend over to pick up a piece of paper and it’s LIGHTS F**KING OUT. Let’s talk about pain. Actually, let’s not. It doesn’t happen often but when it does, I’m (literally) crawling around my house.
5. I kept referring to a recently-hired colleague as the “new kid” in the office only to find out that he was 31. Yikes!
6. WTF?!??! Why don’t these clothes from 2008 fit anymore? And what happened to my toned stomach? Nooooooo!!!!!
7. When some of your work colleagues have never used or seen a rotary phone and have barely heard of a public pay phone.
But wait, there was a time when you used a rotary phone daily and a pay phone at least once or twice per month. Who remembers always having to have change in your pocket in case you needed to use a pay phone?
8. When you watch some of my favorite TV shows from the late 70s and 80s, like The Incredible Hulk (above), and the cars look so f’king old and antiquated.
9. When many folks in your age range on dating sites look so old and beaten down. As you swipe left, thinking she/he is way too old for you, you notice you’re a year OLDER than them!!!
10. (True story) I was visiting Australia and kept finding dance clubs where everyone was 18 to 25. I asked a 20-something where the clubs were for people a little bit older and he replied, “Yes, we also have clubs for the ELDERLY. Follow me and I’ll point a few out to you.”
“Who you callin’ elderly??? I’m still young enough to whoop your …. never mind. Next.”
11. When you’re watching a TV show from the 1980s and 90s and realize that celebs who looked old to you back then were probably the same age as you today. Daayyyuumm!!
12. Oh, and long gone are the days you could splurge on ANYTHING and not worry about gaining weight. If you’re over 40, 98 percent of you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about. Just looking at chocolate cake puts 5 lbs on you these days.
13. (So, you’re single) and chubby and overweight people you wouldn’t have given a second look to 10 years ago start looking kinda hot.
Don’t feel bad for the 50-year-old dude above. He might be a ladies’ man now.
14. When hair dye somehow ends up on your grocery list, monthly. Wait! Is that gray hair? WTF?!?!? Can’t be. I’m still wayyyy too young for this.
15. (True story) I was once talking to a younger writer friend of mine who was a cop in California. He had NO IDEA who Ponch and John were. I’m like, “Ponch and John… CHiPs. You know, the popular show about two California cops. You’re a California cop, how can you NOT know of Ponch and John… You know, CHiPs?”
He was totally clueless about them – And I felt as old as dirt.
PLEASE SHARE YOUR “OFFICIALLY OLD” MOMENTS BELOW.
